Happy Birthday Kakashi-sensei
by fineillsignup
Summary: Genin team 7 fluff.


Note: A furoshiki is a traditional cloth used to wrap presents and bento boxes in Japan.

"Okay! Dismissed. Don't go talking to any strange photographers today, alright?" Team 7 is united in their glower, and their sensei tilts his head as he gives them an eye crease smile. "See you tomorrow at 6am."

"You mean 9am," mutters Sasuke, even though he'll be there at 6 like the other two idiots.

"Ne, Sasuke-kun, when we were looking at sensei's registration card yesterday, I happened to notice that his birthday is next week."

"So what?"

"Well, maybe we should surprise him with a gift?"

Sasuke crosses his arms. "Why would I get him a gift?"

"Shouldn't everyone get gifts from their friends on their birthday?"

"I'm not his friend," says Sasuke, while Naruto says over him, "Hey! Hey! That's a good idea, Sakura-chan! Maybe we should get him a case of cup ramen… that's what I'd want for my birthday dattebayo…" He leans suggestively on this last bit, eyes shining with a vision of Sakura-chan cutely presenting him a variety pack tied with a red ribbon.

"Ramen is a terrible present, Naruto," snaps Sakura, dashing this vision to pieces. She turns back to Sasuke. "Well, we're not his friends exactly, of course, but still… it wouldn't have to be fancy. If we all contribute a little, we could brighten his day and then, maybe, he would go a day without trying to use Thousand Years of Death on one of us."

There is a pause as all three shudder.

Sasuke mutters something that sounds suspiciously like, "Annoying," but he reaches into his pocket and counts out some money. "Here," he says, thrusting it at Sakura. "That's my contribution. I'm going home."

Sakura unfolds the money as Sasuke walks away. "Alright, Naruto. You take half, and I'll take half. You handle the present, and I'll buy the furoshiki and the card. Have it ready on the 15th. _Don't forget._ "

"But I don't know what he—" Sakura is already gone. "…likes ttebayo…" Naruto finishes mournfully. "…ramen is a terrible present…"

Over the next week, every time Naruto pulls out his little froggy money bag, he feels a pang of panic because he's getting closer and closer to the big day and he can't think of what to get for his sensei, other than porn, which won't work because you can't go in Pink Bookstore if you're under eighteen.

The 15th begins to seem more like an upcoming day of execution.

 _"Whaaaat? You didn't get anything, Naruto?! Idiot!"_

 _"What did you expect from the dobe."_

 _Kakashi-sensei winks out of sight in front of them, then suddenly Naruto feels the huge wave of chakra behind and below him indicating that he's about the experience the worst anal pain imaginable—_

Naruto jerks awake in a panic. It's the 15th, and he still hasn't come up with anything, and he's supposed to meet up with the rest of Team 7 in an hour, and the shops aren't even open, and his butt is just not ready for this.

He jumps maniacally around his apartment, as if a gift will somehow materialize and save him. During one bounce off of a table, he nearly knocks one of his many houseplants off, but his reflexes manage to right it just in time.

"That's it!" he screams, and hears the familiar thumb of a broom handle on the ceiling of the apartment below and the neighbour bellowing, "Some of us need to sleep, you brat!"

He arrives at the training ground a few minutes late, and Sakura and Sasuke are already there. Sakura is showing Sasuke the kunai-print furoshiki she managed to find somewhere and chattering non-stop about how she chose between two different birthday cards, while Sasuke's face gives no indication that he's even listening.

"Good morning, Sakura-chan!"

"What did you bring, Naruto?" she says to him, hands on hips.

He triumphantly displays the little plant, and her eyes widen.

"That's… actually not bad, Naruto. It looks like it's in good condition, anyway." She takes the plant and delicately wraps the pot in the furoshiki, tying it with a pretty bow, and then sets it carefully upon one of the stumps. Sakura leans the card against the stem of the plant, steps back, frowns, steps forward, and adjusts the card minutely. "There, perfect."

They wait around doing nothing for an hour or so, when Kakashi-sensei suddenly body flickers in front of them with a lazy, "Yo."

"Happy birthday sensei!" chorus Sakura and Naruto, and while Sasuke doesn't join in, his mouth twists like he's fighting off a smile.

Kakashi's visible eye widens. "How did you know it was my birthday?"

"It was on your identification card dattebayo!" says Naruto before Sakura can hush him.

Their sensei leans forward with a dark look. "That… is classified information…" His hand reaches up towards his hitai-ate.

The three students shrink back in fear, but his hand keeps going past his face and pats each one of them on the head while they're all still frozen. "Buuuuut… I'll let it slide since you got me a gift." He straightens up and eye crinkles at them while they all sag with relief.

"Here it is, Kakashi-sensei!" says Sakura, presenting the plant with a proud smile. "I wrapped it."

"Well, I got the plant!" cuts in Naruto, wanting his share of the credit.

"I paid for it," says Sasuke, grudgingly.

Kakashi takes the plant with a happy sigh. "Ah, the gift of teamwork. I'll take this home right away, so it doesn't get damaged while we train. As a thank you, I'll teach you all a powerful jutsu today."

The three students perk up instantly, and Sakura and Naruto squeal, "Really?"

"Yes," Kakashi smirks. "Get ready to learn the Thousand Years of Death!"

He body flickers away, and the three genin topple over in dismay.


End file.
